Monday, December 29, 2008

BETWEEN THE JOKES, RIDDLES and THE GREAT UNKNOWN





The year 2008 was a little different for me. I didn’t write nearly as much as I had in years past, especially in the beginning.

Signing on to a writer's website in 2003, I wrote something every single day, was methodically and routinely diligent to making sure I did not go to sleep until I wrote something, anything, to have stayed true to my self appointed mandate and chronicle the events of the day. It was kind of like a diary, only more creative. I met the man who would later become my husband, the biggest surprise of all, I could not have written the subplot any better myself.

I’ve been able to publish three books and countless reams of poetry. Even though my life had changed drastically through that time, with interruptions (such as I was just now with “where are the dogs’ leashes?”) and pieces woven in amongst the tragedies of illness and personal loss, it has become apparent to me one distinct possibility has hindered my growth and sustainability.

I have become lazy.

Secure in the knowledge the only ‘real’ deadline was for the paper I write for and my weekly column, I let the thoughts slide off my mind, no longer feeling the urgency to ‘write that down!’ picking at my eyes behind my brain. Too, much of my creativity came from angst, from the need to share my experiences of both the harder things and the great things in life. I'm broke, I'm divorced, my daughter is sick, and all the blah, blah, blah in between, even I got bored by it after a while. The smile of a baby, the death of a friend, the excitement of romance, it was all there, in between the jokes and the riddles and the great unknown. I am one of the lucky ones and I know it - the only problem is that it came off as bragging, almost to the point of rubbing it in your faces. I did it because I was happy and wanted to share it with the world. Too bad the world didn't get it. My beliefs have not changed; I am still enamored by all that surrounds me and the enormity of it all. We are nothing but the eternal dust in the wind, created by a loving and just God who knows all, sees all and will judge all. It ain't up to me.

I’ve proven to myself that I move people; now its time to move them to a different place.

Through out this short and spontaneous career, however, the edict has been the same.

Don’t waste a minute.

Don’t regret a thing.

If you didn’t do something quite right, do it better tomorrow.

There is always tomorrow until there isn’t.

Make 2009 the best year yet. I’m certainly going to try.



In between the laughter and the tears, there will be pride and the thankfulness I feel in my heart - for good friends, healthy children, a job well done and for the opportunity to continue doing it.


Happy New Year to you and yours.








Keep laughing.

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