EYES OPEN

With the parade of celebrities and public figures passing away this year, seemingly one after the other, it makes me wonder why I felt their death so strongly. Although I will agree Michael Jackson certainly had issues, I loved his music and enjoyed witnessing the passion with which he sang. Actress Natasha Richardson’s fatal skiing accident and actor dancer Patrick Swayze succumbing to pancreatic cancer also filled me with such sadness. I cried for all of them as if they were my closest friends.

But when all is said and done, I didn’t really ‘know’ these people. They weren’t my friends and I had no contact with ‘them’ other than tweeting or Facebook entries. So why does their death affect me, make me sad?

A tragedy in my own backyard happened this week with the passing of a lovely woman and neighbor. We weren’t close friends, but I did know her; waving as we passed each other as we went about our lives, trading recipes at neighborhood parties. Her family’s loss is palpable. My heart aches for them and her husband and again I have cried for the loss of another life, gone way too soon.

Our lives touch each other, both celebrity and neighbor, in ways we don’t anticipate. I was the ticket taker for one of my beloved’s comedy shows, smiling and taking the cash from the patrons as they filed into the club.

It was after the show that an audience member wrapped his arms around me and gave me a big hug. “It’s me!” he said with excitement in his eyes. “Do you remember me? I remembered you in an instant!”

I looked into the face of someone I hadn’t seen in close to 30 years. He was a boy who used to courier legal documents between the courthouse and the attorney I worked for, and we would talk briefly on a daily basis. Age had grayed his hair and lined his face in not so particular fashion. Suddenly the spark clicked in my brain, the fact he had recognized me, especially since I look very differently from what I did back then.

“I had long black hair and was 30 pounds lighter!” I laughed. “How in the world did you remember me?”

“Your eyes” he said simply. “I remembered the smile in your eyes.”

So perhaps that is why we connect with strangers we don’t really know, but end up caring about deeply. Our eyes really are the windows to our souls, allowing others to see past the pain or the confusion. We let them in without even knowing it, charging no entry fee or collect a ticket stub. What is viewed goes straight to our hearts, pure love locked away for safekeeping until we need to remember the feelings in times of sadness.

May your eyes always be open, bidding entry into your soul. You never know what effect you will have on them, and they, on you. We have but one life, and it’s easier if we go through it all together. Even with those we don’t really know.